I just wanted to let you know that this piece of yours really resonated with me in so many ways, apart from choosing MDMA as a tool for gaining clarity. That was very gutsy of you. I prefer beer. No wonder I still lack clarity.
You were so ‘right on the money’ with your assessment of the qualities and skills that were considered important back then to succeeding in life so that kids would become conforming members of society. I wanted the positive feedback from the nuns so I would conform, then when it felt so ‘untrue’ I would rebel and break a few rules, just so I didn’t feel so compromised, but it wasn’t very satisfying.
I’ve been a retired special ed teacher for quite a while now, but the one goal I set for my students who were middle school age learning-disabled, was that they finally learn to read. That’s pretty much all I focused on, along with laughing and having crazy fun with them in between times. I figured if they could read, they’d feel better about themselves, and the rest would take care of itself. It was unconventional for sure, but I managed to get away with it, if I kept things under control. That’s all the administration cared about, and those kids did learn to read.
I also really resonated with your description of your relationship with your practitioner, Grace, right down to the very name you gave her. I was fortunate enough during the trials and tribulations of covid to become acquainted with a spiritual coach right here on substack who shared my feelings about what was happening to all of us. I had been very much alone, none of my friends felt the same way and it caused some painful rifts. I called her “my Amazing Grace”. To use your words, …” transmitting love, acceptance, and motherly nurturing. She was like an angel…From that place of love, so much truth came out…I hadn’t felt so loved and nurtured for many years.” Not to mention her crazy sense of humor through which she conveyed some important truths I needed to hear. She also generously showered me with much needed comfort and support during the time of my brother’s death from Covid. He refused to accept the official treatment protocol at the hospital but was denied the alternative antivirals that had a history of being effective. I was so proud of him, but so aggrieved by his loss. The friendship that she and I developed has changed me in ways I couldn’t imagine, and she helped me learn how to save my other life-long friendships, rather than throw them all under the bus, which was what I so wanted to do; just like that Baby Girl in your poem, just toss them behind me without a care. Hahaha! What a dope I was. However, I will admit that the relationships have never been quite the same, which is pretty sad. Some of them have lasted for 58 years!
The last thing that really struck me was what you said about your relationship with your husband. I look forward to hearing about how that was healed. My husband and I divorced for 5 years, but remarried, all tolled 52 years, with 2 grown sons. And we’re still working on some of those same things that caused the breakup in the first place. Oy! I’ve just come to accept it. We have a fiery relationship, that’s all there is to it.
Sorry this was so long, but I wanted you to know how much your writing speaks to me. I look forward to each new essay or poem.
I had computer issues which delayed my response to this piece. Then when I wrote it, it turned out to be
longer that I thought might be appropriate, so I wondered if you might send me an email address so I can have you look at it first. I really just wanted you to see it, so if you decide against posting it, I won't be offended. Thanks. I thought it was totally great by the way.
Hi Mary,
I just wanted to let you know that this piece of yours really resonated with me in so many ways, apart from choosing MDMA as a tool for gaining clarity. That was very gutsy of you. I prefer beer. No wonder I still lack clarity.
You were so ‘right on the money’ with your assessment of the qualities and skills that were considered important back then to succeeding in life so that kids would become conforming members of society. I wanted the positive feedback from the nuns so I would conform, then when it felt so ‘untrue’ I would rebel and break a few rules, just so I didn’t feel so compromised, but it wasn’t very satisfying.
I’ve been a retired special ed teacher for quite a while now, but the one goal I set for my students who were middle school age learning-disabled, was that they finally learn to read. That’s pretty much all I focused on, along with laughing and having crazy fun with them in between times. I figured if they could read, they’d feel better about themselves, and the rest would take care of itself. It was unconventional for sure, but I managed to get away with it, if I kept things under control. That’s all the administration cared about, and those kids did learn to read.
I also really resonated with your description of your relationship with your practitioner, Grace, right down to the very name you gave her. I was fortunate enough during the trials and tribulations of covid to become acquainted with a spiritual coach right here on substack who shared my feelings about what was happening to all of us. I had been very much alone, none of my friends felt the same way and it caused some painful rifts. I called her “my Amazing Grace”. To use your words, …” transmitting love, acceptance, and motherly nurturing. She was like an angel…From that place of love, so much truth came out…I hadn’t felt so loved and nurtured for many years.” Not to mention her crazy sense of humor through which she conveyed some important truths I needed to hear. She also generously showered me with much needed comfort and support during the time of my brother’s death from Covid. He refused to accept the official treatment protocol at the hospital but was denied the alternative antivirals that had a history of being effective. I was so proud of him, but so aggrieved by his loss. The friendship that she and I developed has changed me in ways I couldn’t imagine, and she helped me learn how to save my other life-long friendships, rather than throw them all under the bus, which was what I so wanted to do; just like that Baby Girl in your poem, just toss them behind me without a care. Hahaha! What a dope I was. However, I will admit that the relationships have never been quite the same, which is pretty sad. Some of them have lasted for 58 years!
The last thing that really struck me was what you said about your relationship with your husband. I look forward to hearing about how that was healed. My husband and I divorced for 5 years, but remarried, all tolled 52 years, with 2 grown sons. And we’re still working on some of those same things that caused the breakup in the first place. Oy! I’ve just come to accept it. We have a fiery relationship, that’s all there is to it.
Sorry this was so long, but I wanted you to know how much your writing speaks to me. I look forward to each new essay or poem.
Thank you so much.
Your faithful reader,
“Rocket”
Mary,
I had computer issues which delayed my response to this piece. Then when I wrote it, it turned out to be
longer that I thought might be appropriate, so I wondered if you might send me an email address so I can have you look at it first. I really just wanted you to see it, so if you decide against posting it, I won't be offended. Thanks. I thought it was totally great by the way.
Pure Truth. Pure Love. Always. 🙏 Thank you.