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I loved this, Mary. And the circle image VS the 'boxes' which we tend to live in both as our habitats and in our minds.

Fleshed out the circle is a sphere; as individuated spheres, there is no center - everyone is in the center of their own sphere and here we might glimpse something else profound. (That speaks I think to self-sovereignty in part.)

Particularly when we consider our individual spheres include all our bodies - physical, emotional, mental and spiritual let's say. If most of the internal conflicts we face come down to mental activities (emphasizing only one body) we tend to go to those dualities you lay out so well.

But if we include the others, we've expanded into ourselves, and the information available through all of them. Suddenly the notion that what I know, sense, am aware of, is limited to my mind evaporates.

We are big beings and that can include big minds, but that's only part of the story. I would say I often 'know' something way before my mind has a hold of it. My body tells me, my intuition. The more I open to the fields/bodies of my larger self, the less constrained I am by either/or. Also the more I acknowledge these other facets of my self, the more tangible they become. It's like taking ownership of all of me.

Thank you for opening up this dialog and its ensuing reflection. Much appreciated.

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Such a great comment, Kathleen. You make such an important point: the totality of who we are is rarely visited! We are as addicted to duality as we are addicted to our minds -- and that's a LOT. There is so much information left on the table, as it were, when we can't inhabit all of who we are, our "larger self" as you put it.

And I love this, too: "the more I acknowledge these other facets of my self, the more tangible they become. It's like taking ownership of all of me." Yes!

I think I could talk with you all day...🤓😍

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Yes, no doubt we could talk easily all day, Mary!

It's good to go through these days, able to find such connections - even if not in person. I so enjoy getting to know you. 💕

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“There are no sides in a circle.” So beautifully expressed, Mary! We’ve been so conditioned to take sides and judge one right and the other wrong that it only seems natural to do so. But our “addiction” to taking sides binds us to a position we’re now obligated to defend because we’ve identified our core selves with it. It narrows down our available choices while simultaneously alienating those on the “other side” unnecessarily. Thank you for this timely message about staying open, curious and seeing beyond duality.

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Yes! My husband calls it "driving a car with no gear for reverse." (He grew up with that kind of mother 🙄.) You're right, it's incredibly alienating.

But I know I'm not immune to getting stuck, either. The past few years have been so humbling!

Thank you for the comment that sparked this essay -- it really lit a fire!

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Oct 24, 2023Liked by Mary Poindexter McLaughlin

Driving with no reverse for sure!

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😄I’m so glad you were inspired to write this essay! It’s so important now for us to remember to shift into neutral before we blindly react by taking sides and jumping on a bandwagon. It’s been incredibly humbling and challenging to navigate life over the past three years when everything I believed got upended, but it’s also been extremely clarifying. Like you, I now strive to seek truth and practice the art of freedom as if my life depended on it…because it does. Thank you for being you!!!

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Back atcha, Rev. ❤️

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Oct 22, 2023Liked by Mary Poindexter McLaughlin

It seems “our inclination toward opposites “ and duality is a stage of human development that is easily manipulated but those who desire a One World Order power over others through domination. I have been expanding as well into more “integral” stages of understanding as Ken Wilbur calls them, where ever-widening concentric circles and spirals are the natural structures for these new frequencies beyond duality... I am imagining living in the Monolithic domes being birthed out of a group in Texas and organic, flowing shaped buildings such as the ones by Vetsch in Switzerland with ancient Hobbit-like decor accents that honor and celebrate our being part of the body of the earth... perhaps we are Gaia’s surface micro biome? It still feels like we are the minority in our desire to grow beyond polarity , separation and dualistic thinking , but the exponential power of expanding our consciousness together is palpable and exciting!

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I love this, Marcelle. I join you in your excitement! (Even if I have a harder time envisioning myself living in a dome -- but I'm open! 😂) Thank you for the generous comment and your insights. And the shout-out to Ken Wilbur. I haven't thought about him in a long time...

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Oct 22, 2023Liked by Mary Poindexter McLaughlin

I've been waiting for you to address this issue of RFK, Jr.'s speech. I'm glad you have. I too, was also very surprised to hear Kennedy take Israel's side. Then when I read Charles Eisenstein's reaction to Kennedy, despite the fact that he said all the right things, as in taking no sides, to be honest, I was disappointed in him as well. What I wanted to hear from someone was the TRUTH, as in what we've really been up against for a very long time now, who the real enemy is behind the curtain, and what their agenda is. It's so much bigger than Israel or Palestine, the US vs. Russia/China, Democrats or Republicans, etc. What I've come to realize is that there is a dark force behind all this hatred, contention and divisiveness which is determined to keep us all separated from one another. I read the book by Paul Levy, Wetiko, which is a Native American word for "mind virus" which is a disease of the soul which has the magical ability to extend itself into the outer world and configure events so as to reflect and express the inner state of the psyche that is enthralled by it. Evil does exist, but it contains within itself the antidote. If we but recognize it, it opens our hearts and expands our consciousness, which the powers that be are most afraid of.

You can listen to Paul Levy's introduction to his new book, "Undreaming Wetiko" here.

https://youtu.be/ik0u6Ctwvc0?si=m-prJyjEKgHHaRGK

I just came across this article with Paul Levy here which looks very interesting. I like the title. https://www.awakeninthedream.com/articles/invasion-of-the-body-snatchers-comes-to-life

Oh well, I just thought I'd throw this out there for what it's worth. Thanks, Mary. xox

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You are totally justified in being disappointed by not hearing the TRUTH, Rocket. What I'm coming to believe is that no presidential candidate can speak THAT kind of truth, because the system literally won't allow it -- regardless of whether the candidate is independent or no. Voting for a president, if it even happens in 2024, will probably be what it's always been: casting a ballot for the least distasteful choice. At this point, Kennedy for me is by far the least distasteful. But there's a lot of road between here and there.

I'm very interested in Levy's book and the concept you describe. It makes total sense to me, given what I know about spirit possession and shamanic healing. I will check them both out. Thank you for "throwing out" your thoughts, as always. They are worth a LOT. xox

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I've had a chance to dive into Levy's stuff... holy cow, Rocket. THANK YOU for pointing me in his direction. I'm so excited to read more! 🙏🏼

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wull, my ma has one just like'im at home (he hadda name too!)--an ol' "souvenir" from Bourbon Street in N'Awleans but whenever I thought've bein' stymied "btw. you, me, an' the lampost" I thought've that funny little man just tryin' ta stay vertical! (yup, it'll open a bottle 'er a door... fer conversation! 'member "conversation pieces?") glad y'all had a nice time!

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an' well be in good comp'ny at the lampost lol!

https://tinyurl.com/bdd92wcb

(hope ya hadda nice trip!)

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I love the wee little man and his lampost!! Is that yours? Is it a bottle opener?? (And thank you, I did.)

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Hittin' this late indeed, but as always yer "thinker" is always coverin' interestin' stuff! SO... this "binary," this unnatural push to pick one 'er the other (an' nuttin' in between) IS the problem with the larger world 'round us--AmeriKa, Middle East...an' beyond. EXCEPT with gender--here you don't want ta order "off" the menu--golly! But simmerin' the argument about Gabe or Steven down ta a thick syrup, this makes me think of the ol' LampPost. 'Member the sayin', "Between you an' me an' the lampost?" Given a passle've DUALITY doses, I always picked the dang lamp post! By NOT pickin' either Gabe nor Steven--you too got the lamp post! (So yer married to a lamp post, ha!) My doin' this drove folks nuts (I'm sure sometimes NOT makin' the choice 'tween options given I sounded ungrateful, bratty, 'er sumthin' of a clown--possibly all true! but I never liked limited choices an' some folks seem ta like to LIMIT so much!

Nature aside, kids naturally (when asked) choose the lamppost too! They don't pick "on the menu" fer example, to the open-ended question, "What kinda ice cream do ya want, Cindy Lou," cuz the plucky tot may answer "banana-raspberry-tangerine-spaghetti!" Some parents head this mischief off at the pass by sayin', "they have JUST chocolate an' vanilla"--which d'ya want? Ho-hum. But not given those limits--sky's the limit! Fer many a kid! ...that is 'til they get used ta glass half-empty...sadly... this is too often the case as free-thinkin' kids are too often stuffed inta "little boxes" (like the song!) an' force ta pick sides. I recall if they had only chocolate an' vanilla I'd still ask them to do "half an' half" of each and then request cherry, whipped cream, an' sprinkles (if available). Course I wuz a PIA! This is why I hated teams in school, one against t'other. Makes me think'a Pete Seeger's song "Which side are you on?"... which is a great song...but...well, always 'bout pickin' sides...pick the wrong side an' yer a "lousy scab!"

Also, I agree with what ya shared 'bout BobbyK an' just askin' folks what they want, not which "side" they're on...a good start.

But as fer him pickin' sides an' talkin' reparations--some in the "Devolution" realm (that's purdy WOO but interestin' stuf...) say that's a calculated play on his part to rope in the right kinda "DemoCraps" -- git' em ta go Independent, turn 'em away from Biden even tho' it's all bluffin'. Such crazy talk (reparations? really? open borders, really?) will make sure all on the RIGHT are gonna STILL be REJECTIN' him (on purpose) so doesn't pull one single vote from Trump cuz (so the devolvers say), it's a strategy to push down Biden votes an' up Trumps (cuz Bobby feels he ain't never gonna win, he's there to steer thinkin'...). Not that Bobby's on the Right at all in helpin' Mister Orange--but he's spoutin' certain rhetoric cuz he knows the LEFT is dangerous mess so fer now--he'll toss votes TO Trump by pullin' 'em from Biden. Trump is strategy, not "hero material." IT's 5D chess savin' the vote from the Uniparty. Honestly, I don't put it past him...some've what he's been sayin' is opposite of what he said before...so only way his new talkin' points makes sense is by helpin' Trump "safely" without bein' his runnin' mate. I "vunder"... could it be?

Meantimes, see yer goin' on a vay-cay-shun--so have FUN in "darkest Peru" from whence came Paddington Bear!

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I have many of the same concerns you do about Bobby, and I'm definitely in the wait-and-watch mode. You bring up --as always -- such interesting points, Daisy! And I'll join you at the lampost...😊

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Oct 25, 2023Liked by Mary Poindexter McLaughlin

I think this rejection of duality is what I was going for here: https://thefreethinker.substack.com/p/war-propaganda-is-all-lies-make-this

I phrased it as embracing uncertainty, and refusing to take sides.

You said it better. Thank you.

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I just said it differently. Your piece is terrific, James! Thanks for posting.

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Oct 25, 2023Liked by Mary Poindexter McLaughlin

Thanks, Mary. I added your piece to my round up.

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Thank you, James! And I subscribed... 😊

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Oct 24, 2023Liked by Mary Poindexter McLaughlin

I was getting ready to write what a lovely piece this was when I came across my name! Thank you for those nice quotes. This talk is something that comes back to me often, especially anticipating the other person's objection and acknowledging it as valid before they even speak it. Whew!

And non-duality is near and dear to my heart, hence the title Third Paradigm. I've often thought about your horseshoe illustration in the opposite way: the place between the poles is where the magnetism is. Have you ever noticed how far left and far right often agree? I think there are no continuums, only incomplete circles. Those in the middle just go along with everything. What is compromise when it comes to principles? If you go past the herd on one side or another, and into no-man's land of not even being on the spectrum, that's where I think we find agreement and independent thinking. Thanks for this!

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You're so welcome, Tereza. Thank you for the abundance, always, of thought-provoking content.

Including this comment! That's a very cool concept: "there are no continuums, only incomplete circles." I'm going to have to noodle on that for a while. Or maybe you've written about it before? If so, point me in that direction. I'd love to know more...

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Oct 26, 2023Liked by Mary Poindexter McLaughlin

I'll look, I think I talked about it in a video pre-Substack. It was a personality test in college that got me thinking about it. Masculine-Feminine: I have many masculine traits and many feminine but what I'm decidedly not is something in the middle with neither. If you 'compromise' by each extreme cancelling the other out, it looks the same on a continuum but is really opposite.

Same thing for introvert/ extrovert. I work at being social and I'm good at it, but it's work to me. I can go hard into it and then I need a silent retreat. But I'm not in the middle.

When I talk to lefties who are off the deep end--long time peace activists, homesteading hippies--they have a lot in common with the libertarian right or Amish farmers. Neither one is like the guilt-ridden virtue signaling liberals or NIMBY conservative.

So that's where I developed my theory that there's a magnetic space between opposites, and that's where I want to be.

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Oct 26, 2023·edited Oct 26, 2023Author

That makes so much sense. And I'm like you -- a mash-up of traits that effectively cancel one another out -- but have never thought of it that way. Love the way your mind works. 😊 Thanks for the clarification!

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Oct 23, 2023Liked by Mary Poindexter McLaughlin

One assist for our understanding might be to recognize that polarity is within each category, rather than between categories. Mary, thank-you for your writing and way of looking at things.

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Ooh, I like that distinction, Sounder. Thanks for the addition, and for being here!

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Oct 23, 2023Liked by Mary Poindexter McLaughlin

RFK IS A PLANT...a TROJAN HORSE. and now he wants "RAPE A NATION" ( reparations 🤮") . Don't be FOOLED

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I know many believe that. Why do you think so? I'm curious...

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Oct 23, 2023Liked by Mary Poindexter McLaughlin

"What’s the cheapest way to build houses, roads, cities? Squares and rectangles. Boxes. Straight lines."

Another word for cheap is efficient. Using the fewest resources to crate the same usable space means more people can have a house with the same resources. Also, straight lines are practical. You would have to push your straight bookcase and couch up against a round wall, wasting the space between them, making it hard to clean.

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Absolutely... efficiency is a primary motivator. AND... bookcases and couches were created with straight lines to achieve the same efficiency. What would our world look like if efficiency were always secondary to artistic aesthetic? Or to spiritual impact? I don't know, but I think it's important and intriguing to consider.

Thanks for the comment, Sam!

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I feel so much YES for this big beautiful NO to duality.

This meshes well with my philosophy of “Maybe” described in the essay at the end of this piece:

• “Rites of the Tear-Downers” (https://margaretannaalice.substack.com/p/rites-of-the-tear-downers)

It also goes nicely with this Note (https://substack.com/@margaretannaalice/note/c-42150572), of which one reader stated, “What an absolute perfect statement. How I would love to see RFK Jr say something similar.”

I asked RFK Jr. if he would agree with my statement but haven’t heard back yet :-)

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Margaret, thank you for the hearty YES and for the posting to Notes...🙏🏼

It does mesh beautifully. The "maybe" response is such a godsend... I started using it a few years ago, wishing I had embraced it far earlier in my life. Would have saved so much needless friction and heartache!

I agree with the commenter -- you nailed it. How many times are we going to get fooled by false dichotomies?? It's like every generation is trained to see only the sitcom/drama/horror show, not the set that broadcasts it. So frustrating...

Let me know if RFK Jr gets back to you!

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Oct 22, 2023Liked by Mary Poindexter McLaughlin

How wonderful Mary that you have written such a beautiful piece here and it has so much to do with the practice of joining! I was like what’s this “complimentary” type word when you first mentioned it - why by golly it’s the practice of joining. Wow Zow! See ya soon in the Sacred Valley - Land of lots of circles btw. 🙏 can’t wait to hug in person been way too long!

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Thanks, Cath! It's so funny... I was sorely tempted to put in a paragraph or two about the "joining" you/we do with BeLovedNow, because it IS so analogous, but I just ran out of space!😂

Machu PIcchu here we come! Can't wait, either. xox

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Oct 22, 2023·edited Oct 22, 2023Liked by Mary Poindexter McLaughlin

Thank you for such a thoughtful post. I was curious about the talk on polarization that you mentioned- but the link didn't seem to take me to that talk. I found this: https://youtu.be/L-8b_UtX26c?si=PNheL9IGQIBuzvWZ. Is that the video you were talking about?

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Yes, that's the one. Hmm... I checked it and it worked for me. Here is again for others...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L-8b_UtX26c&t=2172s&ab_channel=AlpineFellowship

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RFK lost me in the last couple weeks. In the event we are allowed to vote in '24, I'm writing in the Buddha of loving kindness my dead dog Jake for Prez, & the Buddha of love & loyalty my dead dog Lunar.

For the record, the Hamas attack (which bears many facets of a false flag) was preceded by 2 days by a Zionist attack on Al Aqsa, the 3rd most holy Muslim site behind Mecca & Medina, by 832 zealots beating, driving from the mosque & spitting on Muslims celebrating the Sukkot holy week.

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Can't say I blame you. I think he lost quite a few others. I'm liking the sound of Jake & Lunar -- that's an oval office filled with LOVE.

Appreciate your comments for the record; I wasn't aware of the days preceding the attack.

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Israel plans to raze Al Aqsa & build a temple on top of it. If they go that far (they already have flattened a 1600s Greek Orthodox Church & are now threatening to bomb the Al Quds hospital holding 10,000 refugees) prepare for all out war.

Their "logic" makes zero sense. "(All good Palestinians) must evacuate "xyz" so we can bomb Hamas (who will stay behind & wait for our bombs).@

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